Moment of Realisation

This time of year that the heat sticks to your skin, and lingers all day long. I am not used to the humidity. I am a Colorado girl. But after three years here, I think I have finally found the key to surviving the hot, muggy summer months- the pool.

Evan seems to love the pool too, and since it is only June, and already we are getting temperatures over 90, getting a summer pass to the pool seemed like the only logical choice if I wanted to survive.

So on Friday, I got Evan into his bathing suit and swim diaper (note to self, put this on at the pool next time- more on this later...), slathered him in sunscreen, and loaded him in the car. This took about 45 minutes. He is not easy to pin down these days.

When we got there, I went to the front desk to purchase my pass. I had to get a picture taken, and as soon as I saw that little globe-like web camera they were going to use, I gave up all hope that I might actually look decent in the picture. So, I set Evan down, and noticed that the whole side of my shirt was soaked. (See note above about swim diaper.) Thankfully the picture was only a mug-shot, so I will only have the memory of this incident, no actual photographic evidence.

They printed out my pass, and we headed out to the pool. I immediately noticed that something was not right. Everyone was out of the pool, and the lifeguards were, very calmly, trying to herd the large group onto the grass. Evan and I joined the group, and that is when I noticed the little boy sitting on the side of the pool, with two gloved lifeguards attending to him and the blood that was gushing out of the back of his head.

It was terrible. I must give the lifeguards credit though, they stayed very calm and really handled the situation well. I think the worst part was that they couldn't find the boy's parents. I guess he was there with his older, and apparently oblivious, brother. I don't know if they contacted the parents finally, or if they just showed up, but eventually I saw his parents arrive.

By this time, there were 2 police cars, an ambulance and a fire truck on the scene. (Keep in mind this is a small town, this is likely the biggest thing that has happened all week.) But I could see the mom take in the situation as she approached the pool. At this point, I don't think she knew it was her kid that they were all there for.

Then, like that, I could see the moment she realised that it was her son that was hurt. Her posture changed. She broke in to a panicked run- because when your baby is hurt you can't get there fast enough. I started to cry when I witnessed this, and even as I type it now, I can feel the lump in my throat.

Before I was a mom, I don't think this would have made me cry. But now, I know. I know that your heart is tied to that little child. I know that you would do anything to keep them from having to feel pain or be scared. And I know the guilt that this mother would feel, probably forever, even though in the end, the boy was fine.

We never made it in to the pool that day. Instead we headed home, and I filled up Evan's little plastic pool. Apparently, it can't compare to the real thing, because he wanted nothing to do with it. Instead, we read books and cuddled, and I thanked my lucky stars that so far, I have not had to be the mother who realises that it is her baby that is hurt. My heart isn't quite ready for that, though I doubt it ever really is.